Feeling the pressure to be a supermum? What does being a supermum mean? Keeping to a schedule with your baby routines? Always looking in tip-top shape? Each generation of mums has its challenges, but in this generation, it is about how we portray ourselves on social media, aka the supermum syndrome. I am about to give you the down low on the misconceptions of being a supermum and feeling the pressure to be a supermum.
I find that with being a mother, we often judge ourselves quite harshly on issues from breast-feeding, comparing our children to other kids, to time spent with our kids. Feeling the pressure to be a supermum is something me and many mums deal with on a day-to-day basis.
I definitely think that social media is mainly to blame.
Pictures don’t show you the true story on whats behind the camera. I like to use the term ”airbrushed pictures”. No one will take a picture with laundry piled up high in the background, or take #fromwhereistand shot on a dirty floor board or dare take a selfie with no make-up. We all want to share the image of the ”supermum” title to our followers, making sure everything is immaculate and selfie proof. God knows what we would do without all the available filters and photo editing apps in todays day and age.
In reality, we are all supermums, even with all the mistakes we do. The motherhood experience is a learning curve in which some things we will excel in, others you will not do so good at and that is fine. There is no definition to the title ”supermum”. If your laundry is piled up high, you forgot to pack you child’s lunch box, or you accidentally forget to wash their PE kits, well you still own that supermum title.
Some misconceptions of being a supermum:
You need to breastfeed your baby and have photographic evidence on facebook to show that you do and you will be damned if you bottle feed your baby. Some women cannot breastfeed for medical reasons. Back lashing for not doing so should not be allowed to happen but it still does. The midwives will always try to push that ”breast is best” but in reality it is not that simple.
2-Status of your home
Your home needs to always look like a show home. No toys, clothes or scooters in site. Like really?
You need to always look good, from your hair, to make-up to nails being done whenever you leave your house. Ok I like to look good but I am a huge fan of also rocking a messy bun when I only have time to run a comb through my hair in the mornings.
4- Post pregnancy body
You need to snap back into your pre-pregnancy body image so you can look good on school runs. In reality, it takes a good year to get back into shape, and it is having this expectation and mind-set from the start that is important. You need to have real expectations and not be envious of the skinny celebrities you see in the magazines who probably had lipo suction and a hands on fitness instructor, (although the latter I could do with).
5-Work and motherhood balance
You need to be back to work within 6 months and manage motherhood at the same time. If you don’t have a kick ass career at the same time as being a full on mum, it doesn’t make you an awful mum. You should not compare yourself to others and do what works best for your family. Some women can cope with being back to work sooner than others and it is ok if you need a little more time adjusting. Plus the extra time with the little ones is always a plus.
Who agrees with me on these?
A take away message: always remember that we are all supermums in our own way.
Don’t get sucked into the social media frenzy of looking good and creating perfect pictures to get the likes. Embrace the flaws, enjoy motherhood and being in the moment.
What are your views on feeling the pressure to be a supermum? I would love to hear about it.